What (this) Woman Want(s)

"What DO women want" is a constant refrain that you hear from men (and other women) and I thought I'd give my own views on the matter to help men navigate the minefield that is cross gender relationships.  Please note that I am basing these points on ME and as we are all individuals they are likely to differ somewhat in specifics.

1. Just To be Listened To

Situation:  I was frustrated that I couldn't get IT support to fix something immediately on my computer so I went to my male colleague to vent.  He went into problem-solving-mode and was giving me more and more options as to how to get IT support to fix my computer more quickly, but I wasn't interested in any of them.  

After about 5-7 minutes of him and I going back and forward in this manner I finally twigged what was wrong ... I wanted sympathy and he was giving me a solution (to a problem that was on its way to being solved).  At which point I broke off and pointed out what we were doing and we both had a good laugh. 

The twist in the tail to this story is that a couple of years later I had a male friend call me for sympathy and I was having none of it, suggesting that killing things on his PS3 will make him feel better!

2. Its the Little Things that Matter

Situation: You've had a fight over who gets to take the rubbish out and you want to say sorry (for the fight - we're not assigning guilt  / innocence here) and bring her some flowers or take her out to dinner.  

Wrong move.  The trigger to her emotion (full rubbish bin) is still there festering in the back of her brain.  Just taking the rubbish out is about the only thing that is going to solve this problem.  The media constantly bombards us with the image that women love big romantic gestures.  Funny, but this isn't true.  Its the little things like washing the dishes without being asked or cooking dinner (assuming you don't destroy the kitchen in the process) - something that makes her life a little easier - that will bring the BIG rewards.

3. Be a Man

This clip is pretty harsh and I'll be the first to admit that these days its increasingly difficult for men to be men.  I own my own powertools and actually KNOW how to use them.  A number of men are threatened by me because of this.  In addition there is enormous pressure for men to get in touch with their sensitive side.  In my mind this is completely overdone and every girl - no matter how much she denies it - is looking for her knight in shining armour to recscue her from her situation and sweep her off her feet.  The fact that I know how to use my powertools doesn't mean that I don't like it when a man does the work for me.  In fact, I love it!  Be brave, be prepared to fail and your woman will stand by you and love you unconditionally whatever happens.

So here are my thoughts into what women want, but as a woman I maintain my god-given right to change my mind at any time (sorry men - you are screwed!), but I hope that next time you find that you're in an argument with the opposite sex that is not going anywhere you'll have an eureka moment and realise that each are talking at different levels (and I'm talking to both men and women on this one) and be able to laugh and diffuse the situation.